Re: OOTI - where using the letters MJO or GLC is a capital offense

by **docstox12** Sun Mar 25, 2018 1:19 am

billg315 wrote:
syosnow94 wrote:
billg315 wrote:Well I will leave these ideas up for discussion among the many and diverse citizens of OTI and renegades of OOTI (which seems now to be all of us) as well as future inhabitants of 3TI or 4TI. For now I am headed to my mom’s 80th birthday party. Maybe I’ll seek her input as she usually has good advice. Enjoy the day!

God bless congrats on moms 80th

Thank you! I can only hope to be in as good shape as my mom at 80, if I’m still going at 80. My consumption of alcohol, junk food and fast food makes the smart bet of my demise the “under 80” on that.

LOL, Billg, that's not a lock by a longshot.My brother in laws Mom made it to 89 and she was overweight, cooked with lard, ate all the stuff that is bad.I smoked cigarettes 35 years, drank gallons of beer and hard liquor,smoking cigars 35 years and I'm still here at age 67.In 1918, most men died around 50,LOL, so by those standards I have beaten the system.One of the keys, I think, to longevity is having 5 good laughs a day.Good for the immune system.You can get 5 good laughs in 5 minutes visiiting OTI and OOTI territories!! Here's to waking up tomorrow morning!! That is, by the way, what I say to anybody who asks me "How is your day going".I say "Great, I woke up"! The rest can go to Hell in a handbasket, which it sometimes does, but who cares, your still above ground.

by **billg315** Sun Mar 25, 2018 8:50 am

Haha! I hear you on all of that. Especially the good laughs part. Yeah I sometimes think maybe the warnings about diet are overdone. I also run so I’m hoping that counteracts it anyway. Yesterday was a great day with mom, thanks for the well wishes.

by **docstox12** Sun Mar 25, 2018 9:04 am

billg I ran 6 miles 3 times a week for 30 years and miss it a lot.My knees became arthritic 5 years ago and I had to stop.Probably why I"m still around,LOL.

by **mikeypizano** Sun Mar 25, 2018 9:18 am

docstox12 wrote:billg I ran 6 miles 3 times a week for 30 years and miss it a lot.My knees became arthritic 5 years ago and I had to stop.Probably why I"m still around,LOL.

I don't run but I walk at least 10-15 miles a day when mowing

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Wed Mar 28, 2018 4:49 am

Iran just recognized OOTI as an independent state joining North Korea and bringing to two the number of countries recognizing the sovereignty of OOTI.

The fact that they are brutal repressive regimes is not important to the half citizen of OOTI.

by Guest Wed Mar 28, 2018 6:13 am

I would suggest offering to set up embassies with them but I'm not sure they would tolerate some of the things that we engage in as diversion. Can anybody here envision an OOTI party in Tehran?

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Thu Mar 29, 2018 5:16 am

Somalia and Uzbekistan join the growing list of repressive totalitarian countries to recognize OOTI as independent. This brings the list to four.

I agree with TheAresian that it’s hard to imagine Iran or any of these countries to condone what goes on here which makes setting up embassies in either of the four problematic.

With that in mind I would like to nominate TheAresian as ambassador of OOTI to all four.

The motion has been put before the OOTI citizenry and passed unanimously 0.5 to 0.0. All hail the new ambassador.

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by **docstox12** Thu Mar 29, 2018 6:54 am

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:Somalia and Uzbekistan join the growing list of repressive totalitarian countries to recognize OOTI as independent. This brings the list to four.

I agree with TheAresian that it’s hard to imagine Iran or any of these countries to condone what goes on here which makes setting up embassies in either of the four problematic.

With that in mind I would like to nominate TheAresian as ambassador of OOTI to all four.

The motion has been put before the OOTI citizenry and passed unanimously 0.5 to 0.0. All hail the new ambassador.

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This borders on sedition and treason and I will consult billg ,OTI's capable Chief Justice, on the legal consequences of OTI harboring OOTI's dalliances with evil rogue states in the Mainland! Should the Good and Beneficent Mainland States ever declare war on Iran, North Korea,Somalia and Uzbekistan, OII, by it's permission to allow OOTI to exist as an independent entity within it's borders, would be dragged into the conflict.I'm afraid the day is coming when secession of OOTI from OTI is approaching lest OTI be dragged into the pit of evil! I await billg's ruling on the culpability of OTI harboring this rapidly evolving evil of OOTI within it's boundaries!

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by **Grselig** Thu Mar 29, 2018 7:14 am

docstox12 wrote:
CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:I know this is an outlaw, banned area and a mad Yukranian roams this territory but I needed a place to really, really get away.

I never expected much from this storm for the N & W but I never expected nothing either. I'm feeling a dose of nothing is coming right now.

AHHHHHHHHHHHH OOTI,

Which reminds me of a song:

Home, home on OOTI
Where the weird and the homicidal play
Where seldom is heard, one weather word
And the skies don't really exist anyway

Just got back from a happy hunting trip. Speaking of homicidal i slaughtered a herd of mutant 3 legged coconuts. Bloody milky mess. Good news OTI and OOTI has a whole lot of barbecued coconut filets to enjoy.

by Guest Thu Mar 29, 2018 11:49 am

To: XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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From: XXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXX XXXX

Subject: Power growth, time travel and threats to our existence

In an attempt to increase our allies and provide a buffer against the threat of possible charges of sedition and treason, I have begun exploring the supernatural with surprising results. During a seance, I was able to make contact with the spirit of Pinochet, who offered recognition of OOTI by his Chilean government provided we could somehow bring back the time of his regime. While the obstacles of time travel are great, the possibility of countless temporal states recognizing our statehood is too great an opportunity to pass up. I will explore the possibilities during my first trip to Somalia. To aid me in my trip, I have started studying the language using this handy video guide.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OCpUjERoMKI

by **Grselig** Thu Mar 29, 2018 11:59 am

TheAresian wrote:To: XXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXX XX XXX XXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXX XXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXX

From: XXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXX XXXX

Subject: Power growth, time travel and threats to our existence

In an attempt to increase our allies and provide a buffer against the threat of possible charges of sedition and treason, I have begun exploring the supernatural with surprising results. During a seance, I was able to make contact with the spirit of Pinochet, who offered recognition of OOTI by his Chilean government provided we could somehow bring back the time of his regime. While the obstacles of time travel are great, the possibility of countless temporal states recognizing our statehood is too great an opportunity to pass up. I will explore the possibilities during my first trip to Somalia. To aid me in my trip, I have started studying the language using this handy video guide.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OCpUjERoMKI

TheAresian,
I have heard through reliable sources that Belgium may be offering an olive branch. I suggest that Leopold II be contacted. He prefers the ouji method and could prove to be a deadly serious ally!!

by Guest Thu Mar 29, 2018 1:53 pm

XXXXXXX,

Thank you for your information regarding the possibility to yet another ally. With each passing minute our strength grows and though we lag far behind both OTI and the Mainland, I am confident that it is only a matter of time before we rival the traditional powers. I have only to overcome the minor snag that has arisen during my time in Somalia as it seems that bringing Pirates ball caps as a show of support has backfired. It also seems that my grasp of the language is poorer than I thought as while I thought I was saying "I come on behalf of OOTI" actually came out as "May countless wildebeests flirt with your mothers." Aside from these minor snafus, all goes well and I hope to have business here concluded shortly.

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P.S. Use of names is strongly discouraged as should these documents be seized, it would prove damning evidence against us in future legal proceedings.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Thu Mar 29, 2018 4:04 pm

TheAresian wrote:XXXXXXX,

Thank you for your information regarding the possibility to yet another ally. With each passing minute our strength grows and though we lag far behind both OTI and the Mainland, I am confident that it is only a matter of time before we rival the traditional powers. I have only to overcome the minor snag that has arisen during my time in Somalia as it seems that bringing Pirates ball caps as a show of support has backfired. It also seems that my grasp of the language is poorer than I thought as while I thought I was saying "I come on behalf of OOTI" actually came out as "May countless wildebeests flirt with your mothers." Aside from these minor snafus, all goes well and I hope to have business here concluded shortly.

XXXXXXXX

P.S. Use of names is strongly discouraged as should these documents be seized, it would prove damning evidence against us in future legal proceedings.

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Dear XXXXXXXXXXXX savior

XXXX XXXX XXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXXXX. lol!

XXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXX? Rolling Eyes

XXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thumbs up

XXXXX XXXXX XXXXXX XXX XXXXXXX XXXXXX XXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX. XXX XXXXXXX XXXXX "XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXX XXX". XXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXXXX XXXX XX XXX XXXXXXX!!!!!! Tired Mad

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by Guest Thu Mar 29, 2018 8:19 pm

Attn: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX,

You sank my battleship!!!!!

by Guest Thu Mar 29, 2018 8:57 pm

Dear x y z

I just checked in and WTF? I’m laughing really hard and don’t even know what I’m reading. This thread is priceless. You guys are money.

Sincerely
A b c d e f g

by Guest Sat Mar 31, 2018 5:35 pm

ATTN: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

RE: Bad news

Rumors have reached me on my flight from Somalia (a trip which yielded mixed results) to N. Korea that OTI cameras may have captured footage of 2 of our operatives. With 15 days still to go before OTI officially closes down for the season, we will be forced to make a decision. Do we pull the operatives and hope to avoid their capture or do we press on? Equally troubling are the stories of a defective pencil sharpener. If we can't keep our office supplies in proper working order, then how can we ever hope to plan our moves against the Death Coconut? On a slightly more positive front, the leader of North Korea plans to honor me with feast of hamburgers, a food which I was surprised to find out his family invented. I will continue to monitor the situation as best I can while making the diplomatic rounds.

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by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Mon Apr 02, 2018 10:53 pm

TheAresian wrote:ATTN: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

RE: Bad news

Rumors have reached me on my flight from Somalia (a trip which yielded mixed results) to N. Korea that OTI cameras may have captured footage of 2 of our operatives. With 15 days still to go before OTI officially closes down for the season, we will be forced to make a decision. Do we pull the operatives and hope to avoid their capture or do we press on? Equally troubling are the stories of a defective pencil sharpener. If we can't keep our office supplies in proper working order, then how can we ever hope to plan our moves against the Death Coconut? On a slightly more positive front, the leader of North Korea plans to honor me with feast of hamburgers, a food which I was surprised to find out his family invented. I will continue to monitor the situation as best I can while making the diplomatic rounds.

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XXXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXX Laughing

Pencil sharpner.
XXX XXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXX XXXXX XXXXX Tired Mad

Death Coconut
XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXX XXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXX XXXX, hamburgers, be careful, the mans nuts. Twisted Evil

Just received a communique from Iceland, they would like to meet with OOTI's new ambassador asap. This is big, the first non dictatorship to seek a diplomatic relationship. I leave the rest to you XxxXxxxxxx.

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by Guest Wed Apr 04, 2018 3:16 pm

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My apologies for the delay in responding as it took me some time to locate the secret decoder ring that turns "Charlie Brown Teacher Speak" to English. The North Korea trip was...... interesting.... to say the least. Apparently, their leader popped the pimple on a flea's backside with a cruise missile without harming the flea. An unusual claim to say the least.

I have changed my itinerary so that I can meet with Iceland immediately. The prospect of a non-dictatorship as an ally is too good to delay. I heard of the troubles with OTI's newest ex-director. No surprise really. He's been an open warmicist for a long time. Lastly, with regards to the Death Coconut, I found a bizarre reference to Project Mounds and Project Almond Joy. I'll keep these under wraps for now. However, I do hope that OTI isn't developing satellites. That would make our jobs much more difficult.

XxxXxxxxxx

by Guest Sat Dec 15, 2018 10:36 pm

I’m here CP. take
Care of
Me

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sat Dec 15, 2018 10:49 pm

syosnow94 wrote:I’m here CP. take
Care of
Me

I know your pleasures Syos, you sick bastard.

The evening will begin with a light snow and temps right around freezing. The snow will pick up around midnight as the temperatures drop into the mid teens. Snow will fall from midnight to 6AM at the rate of 2 inches per hour, and as the sun rises slowly behind the dark, thick, cloud cover the storm will really crank up.

In broad daylight for everyone to see and enjoy snow will fall at 4-5 inches per hour area wide, (except in a one square mile area of Yonkers where winds exceeding 100 mph will prevent any snow from falling).

By dusk your area of weather world will be buried by 70 inches of snow with another 2-3 feet forecast for the evening. Of course you will have passed out before evening arrives, visions of the next mornings 100 inch deep landscape of white wonder dancing in your head. Miraculously when you wake up the morning after there will be no hangover, just sub zero temperatures, no power failures, and the threat of another Miller A only two days away.

That's what we do here in Weather World, and anyone that doesn't like it can get the hell out.

by Guest Sun Dec 16, 2018 12:35 am

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:
syosnow94 wrote:I’m here CP. take
Care of
Me

I know your pleasures Syos, you sick bastard.

The evening will begin with a light snow and temps right around freezing. The snow will pick up around midnight as the temperatures drop into the mid teens. Snow will fall from midnight to 6AM at the rate of 2 inches per hour, and as the sun rises slowly behind the dark, thick, cloud cover the storm will really crank up.

In broad daylight for everyone to see and enjoy snow will fall at 4-5 inches per hour area wide, (except in a one square mile area of Yonkers where winds exceeding 100 mph will prevent any snow from falling).

By dusk your area of weather world will be buried by 70 inches of snow with another 2-3 feet forecast for the evening. Of course you will have passed out before evening arrives, visions of the next mornings 100 inch deep landscape of white wonder dancing in your head. Miraculously when you wake up the morning after there will be no hangover, just sub zero temperatures, no power failures, and the threat of another Miller A only two days away.

That's what we do here in Weather World, and anyone that doesn't like it can get the hell out.

I wish you could see the smile on my face and the peaceful feeling I have. I swear it’s as if this is the first time a man has made me feel this way. Didn’t think a crazy accountant would be my first

by Guest Mon Dec 24, 2018 9:45 am

I’m back CP. after the last quick fix you gave me I need another more than ever. Snow turning to rain (instead of vice versa) overnight into Christmas Eve morning has sent me into a spiral that only you can stop. Help me! I beg you

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Fri Dec 28, 2018 8:01 am

I'm afraid because of the unexpected closure of OTI, Weather World, which existed only through generous subsidies from OTI, will be closing at midnight tonight.

Weather World was a short and unsuccesful attempt to reinvigorate the declining tourism on OTI. However, after a week of operations we have been slapped with a lawsuit from the leader of the Warmacists. With our attorney general Billg consumed with more important duties on the Mainland we can no longer adequately defend ourselves, and we filed for bankruptcy immediately after reading our esteemed Directors post.

We have always tried to accommodate all weather types, from Snow Weenie to Warmacist and every weather type in between, but our diversity was ultimately our undoing. The Warmacists have sued Weather World, an extension of OTI, for 100 billion Cocannas for failing to properly treat all the sick, twisted SOB's that voted in Warmacist leader Math23x7's poll, declaring they would prefer a warm Christmas over a cold one, no not a beer. As the founder of Weather World I refused treatment for these individuals not because of their political leanings but because of their lack of symptoms. They wanted warmth, they got it. They have no use for the resources of Weather World or OTI for that matter.

I realize this puts our one patient (Syos) in jeopardy of a relapse but I'm not sure he can be helped anyway.

We would like to acknowledge before we close that SENJsnowman does exist, thereby hoping to avoid a future class action lawsuit from our friends from the south jersey shore of neglect.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Fri Jan 04, 2019 11:37 am

OOTI - where using the letters MJO or GLC is a capital offense - Page 6 When_t12

When the Musics over, so is Weather World.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkKRU1ajKFA

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Wed Jan 11, 2023 8:44 pm

After 4 long years, We’re back in business.

All are welcome except any religious nuts from the Mainland that continue to believe that Winter exists. Open your eyes ladies and gentleman it’s as plain as the nose on my eyebrow less face. The existence of Winter, if it ever did exist, belongs in the fables and tales from a time long forgotten.

by **docstox12** Fri Jan 13, 2023 6:12 am

Your devotion to civic duty by re-opening OOTI is beyond words.With OTI's re-opening due to Billg's amazing de-radiation work which will go down in the annals of dish detergent history, we now have done everything we can to try and change the course of the miserable snow-less winter Mainland residents have been suffering.If there is a snowstorm this season, it will have nothing to do with any teleconnections or modeling, but from the self sacrificing efforts you, myself and Billg have put in to opening up the Island.
Meet me today at Happy Hour at the Coconut Lounge for boozy discussions of the fables and tales of the existence of winters long ago.

by **dkodgis** Sat Jan 14, 2023 1:06 pm

Umh...I just stopped by for a drink and a look around.

My offense is rank for not coming by sooner

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