OTI- Radiation contained - The Island is habitable again as of Jan 2023

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:

docstox12 wrote:

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:Doc:

When you return from your diplomatic mission in Fort Lee as a first order of business please put before the Parliament a bill to remove as Dir. of Landscaping Mikey P. While it is understood that everyone must make a living it is still the gravest of sins to put food, clothing, and providing for yourself above the need for a good snowstorm. An attitude like this can not be tolerated on OTI and shouldn't be tolerated anywhere IMO.

Mikey P let his true feelings be known on the banter thread, which of course we have been covertly planning to annex within the next couple of months, and he can no longer be in my opinion a director on OTI. I will leave it to Chief Security Officer snowman to determine whether or not he should even be allowed to visit, or live.

May the snow be with you, and may the death coconut help us all achieve our final goal.

CPcan'tmeasuresnow
Director of the Treasury
Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler

Very serious charges indeed! However, here at OTI, unlike the madman that rules OOTI, we temper justice with mercy.Before Parliament proceeds with expulsion proceedings, I would invite Director of Landscaping ( for now), Mikey P to report to OTI for an explanation of the statements mad on the Mainland weather banter board.

Good Lord Doc, spoken like a true politician. Of course we do not want to run our place like the mad Ukrainian of OOTI, and the ambassador over there flying around making deals with rogue nations but let the man's own words convict him.

I re-posted just one of his comments from the banter thread. If we can't convict based on this one post alone why have a justice system.

mikeypizano wrote:

Math23x7 wrote:So this has turned out to be a decent snow season.

You can say that all you want, it doesn't make mine any better. In fact I would change my winter grade to a D-. This needs to END and NOW. I was supposed to be out doing cleanups Monday, it was the ONE day I had this week that was SUPPOSED TO BE DRY. We got rain yesterday, going to rain today, so even if it does stay dry tomorrow, it will be too cold and still wet to do any cleanups. Looking at the 10 day, it looks like I will lose all next week too now...

You people that keep wanting this snow are getting on my last nerves, and you can throw me off OTI... By the time I get these cleanups started, it will be time to start mowing, and with some mulch jobs that will need to be done, I will be 25 yards behind again this year! I was running behind most of last year!

A pity, a pity! This evidence, especially the egregious statement of "you can throw me off OTI" displays an attitude that fits right into the charges you have brought up, Director of the Treasury CP.I tried to display as much leniency as possible, as it is a rare event to get a new citizen here on OTI . and felt Mikey P had much potential to offer OTI.However, you are absolutely corect in bringing up the warmacist charges and I will have Parliament convene to draw up expulsion papers as per Chief Justice Billg's approval.

Docstox
Director of OTI Parliament
Director of OTI Sanitarium

PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT

As we rapidly approach closing day, April 15, Anno Domani 2018, I, your Director of Parliament and ITI Sanitarium, would like to thank all our Mainland Visitors who traveled to our Island and Sanitarium to avail themselves of the tropical paradise and many available therapies for now malady syndromes.Sadly, I must report that the Sanitarium barely broke even, mainly due to the above normal snow and below normal temperatures in many Mainland areas.February was a record month of revenues at our Sanitarium and that ameliorated some of the fiscal damages.

I would like to thank all of our Directors, the multi-personalitied CP, Syosnow who did double duty when our former director of the Coconut Lounge Aresian took his leave,Mikey P, whose short stint as Director of Landscaping was cut short when his warmist bias was exposed,Mike our Director of Technology and the talented Attorney General Billg.

I heartily wish all of you a great Spring and Summer, if that's even possible, and already am counting the days until OTI opens for business on Oct. 1,2018.A skeleton maintenance crew will remain on the Island and I shall check now and then to see what develops over these cruel months to come for winter afficiandos.

I leave you all with this little clip of "good night"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yp7r0j4XrO8

Since the number of replies including this post (475) is divisible by 25, this is the first post of the new page.

Anyway, as we approach the OTI recess, I want to give some insight on how this past season went:

As a lot of you know, in mid-December last year, I moved into an apartment on the Upper East Side from my parents house in Bellerose. I wanted to be close to the office but since it is midtown Manhattan, I did not want to live in that neighborhood because of how hard it is for snow to accumulate there. So I basically went one neighborhood north where maybe I would see a bit more snow. In addition, it's not far from Central Park. I looked at several apartments and most of them had a building just feet past the window giving practically no view, prompting me to pass on them. I mean, think about it, you spend hours, days, even weeks tracking a potential snow event. What is the payoff moment? Waking up and looking out the window at the snowy landscape, the same way a kid does. The one I chose had just that: a view several flights up towards an intersection. Nevertheless, I would learn that even this neighborhood feels the urban heat island effect, though not as much as midtown.

There was only one one-inch plus snowstorm that actually accumulated onto the streets of midtown (the January 4th bomb cyclone). I went into the office that day and just couldn't believe that even 42nd street would be buried in snow. Of course, when you have brutal cold air locked in before and during the event combined with high snow rates, it's going to accumulate even there. Also, it was the only one-inch plus snow event that didn't melt right away and we had the coldest air of the season come in right afterwards, which froze parts of the Hudson River. I went to take a look at it myself and it was quite the scene.

Then, we endured a 52 day stretch from January 9th to March 1st in which the weather pattern was generally unfavorable for snow development. While there were cold days, it was overall 5-6 degrees above average, including the warmest February on record. But as I mentioned, when I came to understand the Urban Heat Island, I would go travel outside to snowier locations (the way a storm chaser does). I did just that on February 17th when I took the 4 train to Woodlawn and walked several miles to Yonkers and Wakefield and it was quite the scene. Of course, we had the blowtorch four days later which melted it all away.

Now, once March developed, the blocking developed. For whatever reason, I decided to stay put where I was. The first three events (2nd, 7th, 13th) were all influenced by the UHI preventing me from experiencing big snow (although the 7th dropped several inches). With each one, I was getting upset which prompted me to lower my expectations to not get good snow. And on March 21st, when the next snowstorm panned out, I had to work in the office in midtown. When I learned this two days prior, I was upset thinking I would miss out on it. (Thus getting the nickname "Eeyore"). Instead of going into northern Westchester like I had planned, I had to "settle" to a place south. But as it turns out, I went to the southeast corner of Van Cortlandt Park just after 7 PM. I walked a bit into the Park and saw a somewhat open, untouched, snowy landscape with the tree branches and the grass covered in snow. This moment was absolutely breathtaking. It was at the moment that all of the pessimistic feelings, all that agita, all that aggrevation, suddenly and abruptly disappeared. I just watched in awe as I continued to walk through the Park and saw what I had missed out all that month. And later that evening, I went through Central Park with a similar experience. This was a very special moment for my snow loving part of myself. (And also, had I gone where I initially intended, I would have seen less snow than where I actually went so that was the payoff moment for me )

Now, less than two weeks later, we tracked an event for early April, the day after Easter. I woke up just before 7 AM to see the snowfall. Because of the high rates of snow, it actually overcame the UHI! This was very exciting for me. After taking my stroll through Central Park, it brought me to awe once again.

Overall a very a nice winter given the circumstances. It seems my "Debbie Downer" feelings can be attributed to a dearth of snowfall and once it comes, I lose that feeling. I may post pictures from the snow events for the citizens and government leaders of OTI to see but unless that happens, or unless we get a freak mid-April to early May snow event, this will probably be my last post of the Tourism season.

Over and out.

Math23x7
Director of Technology

As I listen to the crickets all around me on my surprise visit to OTI, I share this small bit of positivity in this, the deepest, darkest night for winter lovers, the official beginning of summer.In that deep darkness the meager flicker of a small candle becomes visible from far away.Starting tonight, the days begin to get shorter, small steps to our official October 1 opening begin! Have a great summer everybody!

Docstox (official OTI Titles on vacation for now)

OTI BULLETIN SEPTEMBER 13 ANNO DOMANI 2018:

All OTI Governmental, custom officials and sanitarium staff, please be advised that mentioning of the 2018-2019 winter on the Mainland is now being reported.Organize your personal effects and prepare for opening on October 1.It has been a particularly miserable summer on the Mainland with relentless rains and dew points over 70 with little sun to speak of.I suspect that early arrivals to the Island will be noticed this upcoming season.

We thank the Mainland Officials once again, for extending OTI's Guarantee Of Safety for yet another year and we all here pledge to serve Mainlanders in every way possible.

Here's to another amazing winter season of interesting tracking and copious amounts of snow throughout ALL Mainland Areas.

Docstox
Director of OTI Parliament
Director of OTI Sanitarium

HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN!!!!!!!

As that old tune goes, so we here at OTI, celebrate the re-opening of the Island and it's facilities to serve the Mainland in the upcoming winter of 2018-2019.We are approaching our 5 year anniversary of inception come March of 2019!

As we leave the misery of a most distressfuly hot, humid and wet summer behind us and begin to enter the cool night-colorful leaf period just prior to winter, we here at OTI will continue to serve Mainlanders with recreation and therapy for SDS(suppression depression syndrome) ,OTSD ( out to sea depression) and SDP(substinence depression psychosis) amongst other maladies that occur in a winter season.

We thank Emperor Frank for his gracious approval of our autonomy , albeit still a province of the Mainland.

I have re-opened Parliament and the Sanitarium is fully staffed and up and running.I expect Directors of other departments to gradually start to wander in and report for duty.

As always, "service with a smile",

Docstox
Director of OTI Parliament
Director of OTI Sanitarium
October 1, Anno Domani 2018

I have a feeling our citizens will need OTI more than ever this season. I hope OTI members are ready to give it their all. They may even want to consider hiring.

Frank, thank you for the visit and you have my assurance that we at OTI will continue to maintain our standards of excellence in serving the Mainland Community during the stressful  times that storm tracking during this winter will bring.Our own SOTPMI (Seat of The Pants Meteoroligical Institute) here at OTI, using fuzzy memories of ancient analogs of winters gone by, forecasts a mild and rainy Fall lasting well into December with many storms after that featuring dangerous rain/snow lines all over the Mainland Areas.We are hoping that this proves to be 100% inaccurate and we have an amazing cold, snowy winter breaking the 1995-1996 snow totals for all.

As they said many years ago on broadcast tv..."Stay Tuned"!

Let the tracking begin!

Some excellent news for Mainland winter lovers came in yesterday.The long range Euro sees colder than normal temps and more snow than average this season.This should produce many mind bending storm tracking situations and lead to an uptick in business here at OTI.Perhaps that planned addition to the Sanitarium will come to pass.Meanwhile, summer lingers on in the Northeast Mainland areas .

Seeing the Emporers post and Doc following suit I am reporting for duty

syosnow94 wrote:Seeing the Emporers post and Doc following suit I am reporting for duty

Seeing my temp at 32 degrees and seeing you reporting for duty Jimmy made my day an amazing one, even at this early hour! We had an uptick of phone calls inquiring about stays at the Sanitarium after Lee Goldberg's long range winter forecast of normal to above normal temperatures!

Present

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:Present

A perfect day just got BETTER with my right arm reporting in!!!!!

SANITARIUM INTEROFFICE MEMORANDUM

All sanitarium staff please be advised that a sudden influx of calls inquiring treatment for the dismal Fall color season on certain Mainland areas is happening.Callers complain of lack of , dullness and lateness of color this season.The Assistant Director of The Sanitarium, Syosnow, is handling this sudden massive influx of callers and visitors in his usual
speedy and efficient way, a true testimony to the capabilities of OTI Directors and Staff.

Docstox
Director of OTI Parliament
Director OTI Sanitarium

docstox12 wrote:

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:Present

A perfect day just got BETTER with my right arm reporting in!!!!!

Thank you , my good friend.

As a protest this year I will refrain from using my official titles on OTI until we have received a measurable snowfall, 0.1 inch or more, in the HV.

CPcantmeasuresnow
" "

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:

docstox12 wrote:

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:Present

A perfect day just got BETTER with my right arm reporting in!!!!!

Thank you , my good friend.

As a protest this year I will refrain from using my official titles on OTI until we have received a measurable snowfall, 0.1 inch or more, in the HV.

CPcantmeasuresnow
"                                                         "

Wonderful idea.In solidarity, I too will refrain from official title usage!!!

Docstox
*

The OTI Bureau of Mainland Snowfall Statistics has created a new unit vis a vis CP's theory of fantasy snow map versus actual production in the Mainland.

I will chair this department and keep official totals comparing fantasy maps and actual snow production for the lower Hudson valley area of the Mainland.I will use the average of the different models for the fantasy maps they issue for a particular storm.

Official totals will be released on April 15 2019.

That is all

Docstox
**

Here you are CP finally rising out of your summer hibernation as a result of last weeks 28.4 degrees!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9Uh_SqMRm4

docstox12 wrote:                     SANITARIUM INTEROFFICE MEMORANDUM

All sanitarium staff please be advised that a sudden influx of calls inquiring treatment for the dismal Fall color season on certain Mainland areas is happening.Callers complain of lack of , dullness and lateness of color this season.The Assistant Director of The Sanitarium, Syosnow, is handling this sudden massive influx of callers and visitors in his usual
speedy and efficient way, a true testimony to the capabilities of OTI Directors and Staff.

Docstox
Director of OTI Parliament
Director OTI Sanitarium

Dear director,

I URGENTLY REQUEST HELP AT THE SANITARIUM. PERHAPS EVEN THE OTI MILITARY!!

I have been dealing with the massive influx of patients with “lackofproperfoliagesyndrome” or what we’ve termed LPFS. I and my staff have been experimenting with different drug cocktails and a series of paint by number activities which are full of beautifully colored teees and snowy landscapes. As usual our treatments are working.

The problem is that a group of “Warmiccists” on the mainland perhaps led by our formerly beloved Math or possibly even the estranged Aresian are seeking to regain power through their mob tactics. (see what I did there) They have been paying people to show up at our border seeking “treatment” and asylum. This is threatening to overrun our security forces and plunge our island oasis into chaos. I fear only OTI troops massing at the border can turn back these hordes.

Please respond quickly as the situation is quickly deteriorating. I myself am properly anesthesized but am running short on manpower

That is all.

Syosnow

syosnow94 wrote:

docstox12 wrote:                     SANITARIUM INTEROFFICE MEMORANDUM

All sanitarium staff please be advised that a sudden influx of calls inquiring treatment for the dismal Fall color season on certain Mainland areas is happening.Callers complain of lack of , dullness and lateness of color this season.The Assistant Director of The Sanitarium, Syosnow, is handling this sudden massive influx of callers and visitors in his usual
speedy and efficient way, a true testimony to the capabilities of OTI Directors and Staff.

Docstox
Director of OTI Parliament
Director OTI Sanitarium

Dear director,

I URGENTLY REQUEST HELP AT THE SANITARIUM. PERHAPS EVEN THE OTI MILITARY!!

I have been dealing with the massive influx of patients with “lackofproperfoliagesyndrome” or what we’ve termed LPFS.  I and my staff have been experimenting with different drug cocktails and a series of paint by number activities which are full of beautifully colored teees and snowy landscapes.  As usual our treatments are working.  

The problem is that a group of “Warmiccists” on the mainland perhaps led by our formerly beloved Math or possibly even the estranged Aresian are seeking to regain power through their mob tactics.  (see what I did there) They have been paying people to show up at our border seeking “treatment” and asylum. This is threatening to overrun our security forces and plunge our island oasis into chaos.  I fear only OTI troops massing at the border can turn back these hordes.

Please respond quickly as the situation is quickly deteriorating. I myself am properly anesthesized but am running short on manpower

That is all.

Syosnow

Syosnow:

Your amazing efforts at dealing with LPFS are of Sanitarium legend! Not only am I sending extra personnel to assist you with the patients you have but I have scoured worldwide to find noted authorities on LPFS and have convinced Dr.Cora Phyll, Dr.Dropemoff and Dr.Greenleaf to fly over from the Swiss Institute of Chloraphyll Management to treat the patients at the Sanitarium.

The OTI Department of Defense has been notified of the mobs assembling on the border to fortify our Customs Officials.Extra coconuts, sticks, stones and sand have been ordered and will be arriving shortly to help turn back any attacks the mobs may try.

We emphasize that all are welcome at OTI but must be accepted in legal OTI terms!

I leave this dire situation, ironically happening way before any winter weather conundrums have appeared , mere days after our opening at OTI, in your capable hands.

Thank you Doc. Things are crazy down here. Law
And order must AND WILL PREVAIL

Advisory Ruling
OTI has, always, had a system for the orderly, legal ingress of people wishing to visit or settle on this island.  Individuals MUST follow those orderly procedures to gain admittance to the island as a resident or on a visitor permit seeking temporary treatment before returning to the mainland.  This island has limited resources and is often subject to large influxes of people when the weather on the mainland goes south -- which is to say is overly warm or snowless, or lacking in appropriate Fall folliage color. For this very reason there must be a well ordered process for admitting or denying entry.  Anyone who doesn't follow said procedures is Ipso Facto in violation of our laws and can be prevented from entering the island by any means necessary as they are not entitled to constitutional protection on OTI before entering OTI.  I leave it to Parliament to determine the exact regulations regarding entry to the island, but advise that from a legal standpoint, anyone not following existing procedures who is detained while entering the island is not entitled to any special protection.  As the Emperor stated above, this winter could have everyone on this island working overtime to deal with mainlanders seeking treatment -- and with such a stress on our resources forecast, we simply cannot allow our ports to become an unregulated turnstile.

Billg315
Chief Justice and Excellent Inquisitor

Thank you Bill. Well said

As a quick update.....masses of people continue gathering at our border. Myself and my staff have been slapping multicolored paint on them through the chain link fence to deter them from trying to enter. As a side effect of this technique from afar these people with their now painted multicolored faces now seem to make up for some of the dull fall foliage this season. This has made some of our current patients and island dwellers a little more happy. Killing two birds with one stone over here

billg315 wrote:Advisory Ruling
OTI has, always, had a system for the orderly, legal ingress of people wishing to visit or settle on this island.  Individuals MUST follow those orderly procedures to gain admittance to the island as a resident or on a visitor permit seeking temporary treatment before returning to the mainland.  This island has limited resources and is often subject to large influxes of people when the weather on the mainland goes south -- which is to say is overly warm or snowless, or lacking in appropriate Fall folliage color. For this very reason there must be a well ordered process for admitting or denying entry.  Anyone who doesn't follow said procedures is Ipso Facto in violation of our laws and can be prevented from entering the island by any means necessary as they are not entitled to constitutional protection on OTI before entering OTI.  I leave it to Parliament to determine the exact regulations regarding entry to the island, but advise that from a legal standpoint, anyone not following existing procedures who is detained while entering the island is not entitled to any special protection.  As the Emperor stated above, this winter could have everyone on this island working overtime to deal with mainlanders seeking treatment -- and with such a stress on our resources forecast, we simply cannot allow our ports to become an unregulated turnstile.

Billg315
Chief Justice and Excellent Inquisitor

Chief Justice Billg, Parliament thanks you for your feedback in this urgent matter and will immediately craft immigration law with your legal guidelines in mind.OTI borders must be respected or ,indeed, why have any borders at all, if undocumented persons are allowed to enter via mobs!An emergency committee of Parliament, chaired by yourself, will attend to this matter forthwith.OTI is fortunate indeed to have you serving as our Chief Justice and excellent Inquisitor!

Docstox
** (Cp and I are refraining ATM in listing our titles until .01 inche of snow is recorded in our Mainland Estate area in the HV of NY to protest the substandard Fall Foliage season there)

syosnow94 wrote:Thank you Bill. Well said

As a quick update.....masses of people continue gathering at our border. Myself and my staff have been slapping multicolored paint on them through the chain link fence to deter them from trying to enter. As a side effect of this technique from afar these people with their now painted multicolored faces now seem to make up for some of the dull fall foliage this season. This has made some of our current patients and island dwellers a little more happy. Killing two birds with one stone over here

This is pure genius and an amazing example of the resourcefulness and cleverness of OTI Ofiicials! Parliament has a special medal to give to you syosnow,for your service in this mattrer.A special ceremony will take place after this immigration crisis blows over.

Docstox
**

Some very lengthy, intelligent and  funny posts the past couple of days. I’m afraid it’s to early in the season and morning for me  to add much. Until that first tenth of an inch falls I remain title less and void of wit and humor.

Cpcantmeasuresnow
“————“

CPcantmeasuresnow wrote:Some very lengthy, intelligent and  funny posts the past couple of days. I’m afraid it’s to early in the season and morning for me  to add much. Until that first tenth of an inch falls I remain title less and void of wit and humor.

Cpcantmeasuresnow
“————“

From the amazing Chuck McCann and the classic WPIX TV NYC, I offer this in your time of gloom!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qzbpcFS41w