Re: OT: "Off-Topic Island"

by **billg315** Fri Jan 13, 2017 5:40 pm

Meow.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sat Jan 14, 2017 7:56 am

syosnow94 wrote:Just a thought here dear leader.

Maybe we should skip the mangos altogether and go straight to cows. Yes cows as currency. Old fashioned barter system. My intel tells me that hardcore members of the global warming argument have suggested that an increase in the amount of cows in the middle of the United States is partly responsible for an increase in methane gas being released into the atmosphere. This is an actual argument that has been presented. The cows eat too much grass which in turn makes them flatulate too frequently. This problem could be solved if we trade and barter the cows then slaughter them saving our planet from more horrible methane gas intrusion. As an added benefit it may actually help our dear friend CP finally leave the sanitorium as he realizes that avg. temperatures on the mainland have stabilized.

How can we run an imaginary cyber based island, run by a retired dentist, with an imaginary queen that runs around in a snow bikini, an exiled king that couldn't make it snow, a head of security in exile, a Director of immigration that hasn't set foot on the island in over a year, a grand high exalted mystique ruler with a zookepper obsession and illegals that seem to come and go, gres (thundersnow), billg, math, syos, with no regard to imaginary borders, if we make ridiculous suggestions like a cow based currency? Honestly!!

I am:

CP Cantmeasuresnow
OTI Director of the Treasury (2nd term)
Grand High Exalted Mystique Ruler

by **docstox12** Sat Jan 14, 2017 8:14 am

Yes, OTI Treasury Director and Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler, OTI definitely is a cyber location of what some would consider madness.However, if you look at Mainland economics, such as printing currency to oblivion to service 20 trillion in debt, then what syo suggests is not far from the Mainland madness! At least syo's suggestion would result in a true "shovel ready" project because we would have to hire many workers to follow those cows around cleaning up after them.We at Parliament have been neglectful, as you point out, in not enforcing visitor visas and citizenship requirements, but if not for Greselig, syo, math, billg, OTI would have NOBODY at all coming here,LOL.Even our exiled King Mugsy, Taffy and Snow refuse to set foot on OTI for reason or reasons unknown.We have kept a very liberal tourist and citizenship application process as a result.Happily, we are over 12,000 total visits since the Island was originated and in that, I take great pleasure.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sat Jan 14, 2017 9:12 am

syosnow94 wrote:Just a thought here dear leader.

Maybe we should skip the mangos altogether and go straight to cows. Yes cows as currency. Old fashioned barter system. My intel tells me that hardcore members of the global warming argument have suggested that an increase in the amount of cows in the middle of the United States is partly responsible for an increase in methane gas being released into the atmosphere. This is an actual argument that has been presented. The cows eat too much grass which in turn makes them flatulate too frequently. This problem could be solved if we trade and barter the cows then slaughter them saving our planet from more horrible methane gas intrusion. As an added benefit it may actually help our dear friend CP finally leave the sanitorium as he realizes that avg. temperatures on the mainland have stabilized.

cpcantmeasuresnow wrote:How can we run an imaginary cyber based island, run by a retired dentist, with an imaginary queen that runs around in a snow bikini, an exiled king that couldn't make it snow, a head of security in exile, a Director of immigration that hasn't set foot on the island in over a year, a grand high exalted mystique ruler with a zookepper obsession and illegals that seem to come and go, gres (thundersnow), billg, math, syos, with no regard to imaginary borders, if we make ridiculous suggestions like a cow based currency? Honestly!!

I am:

CP Cantmeasuresnow
OTI Director of the Treasury (2nd term)
Grand High Exalted Mystique Ruler

docstox12 wrote:Yes, OTI Treasury Director and Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler, OTI definitely is a cyber location of what some would consider madness.However, if you look at Mainland economics, such as printing currency to oblivion to service 20 trillion in debt, then what syo suggests is not far from the Mainland madness! At least syo's suggestion would result in a true "shovel ready" project because we would have to hire many workers to follow those cows around cleaning up after them.We at Parliament have been neglectful, as you point out, in not enforcing visitor visas and citizenship requirements, but if not for Greselig, syo, math, billg, OTI would have NOBODY at all coming here,LOL.Even our exiled King Mugsy, Taffy and Snow refuse to set foot on OTI for reason or reasons unknown.We have kept a very liberal tourist and citizenship application process as a result.Happily, we are over 12,000 total visits since the Island was originated and in that, I take great pleasure.

Don't forget about the 10,000 person visit scandal perpetrated by another illegal alien at the time, the nefarious and formerly wealthiest man on the island Math23x7. Adjust those totals down by 1,000 or so and that will give us a more accurate visit total.

by **billg315** Sat Jan 14, 2017 1:46 pm

I prefer the term "undocumented" for my status and while in that status I am requesting full island benefits. Including cow currency and free cat forecasts.

by **Grselig** Sat Jan 14, 2017 3:14 pm

I prefer to remain in hiding just below the observatory powers of the establishment. Just remember Jonny Rambo was a drifter. Best if he was left alone. So if you see a drifter carrying buckets of cows mangos and coconuts, leave him alone. And don't try to clean him up!

by **docstox12** Sat Jan 14, 2017 7:19 pm

Grselig wrote:I prefer to remain in hiding just below the observatory powers of the establishment. Just remember Jonny Rambo was a drifter. Best if he was left alone. So if you see a drifter carrying buckets of cows mangos and coconuts, leave him alone. And don't try to clean him up!

LOL, Grselig, read you loud and clear.

GREAT movie, Rambo! "Shave him DRY!" ,LOL

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sun Jan 15, 2017 10:52 am

Notice to all OTI CITIZENS and the Director of Parliament.

I am checking voluntarily into the OTI sanitarium today due to the extreme stress caused by the idiots at the Conservancy and NOAA who continue to F up and in NOAAs case ignore the years and years of under measured snowfalls in Central Park.

I hope to return to my duties as Director of the Treasury and Grand High exalted Mystique Ruler as soon as possible.

While I'm away I would like Billg to file a lawsuit against the conservancy and NOAA for one billion American dollars or 26 billion mangos in OTI currency for extreme mental, and physical damage caused to me by their incompetence. I hope to see you all again soon.

by **docstox12** Sun Jan 15, 2017 11:19 am

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0eUFhMRVHA

CP, only YOU I think will appreciate this clip of what is going to happen to you when you check into the OTI Sanitarium and get the well deserved rest and care you deserve in your magnificent, although mentally challenging, quest for more exact snow measurements at CPK.In this clip, YOU are Costello and I am Abbot checking you in.

by **Grselig** Sun Jan 15, 2017 12:23 pm

CP. my thoughts and prayers for a speedy recover prior to the potential February blockbusters. Hope that lawsuit teaches those bastards a lesson.

by **billg315** Sun Jan 15, 2017 3:32 pm

As the Acting Attorney General for Off-Topic Island (self-appointed to the temporary position for the purposes of this legal action) I, Billg315, come before the Superior Weather Court and hereby give Notice of the following Motion to be heard at a time and place determined by this Honorable Court:

People of Off Topic Island and
CPcantmeasuresnow
v.
NOAA, the National Weather Service,
The Central Park Conservancy, the Wildlife
Conservation Society (in its role as
manager of the Central Park Zoo),
the City of New York, et al . . .

We hereby allege the following charges against the defendants in this case.

There has been a persistent under measurement of official snowfall totals in Central Park dating back many years, perhaps decades. This has led to tainted official snowfall totals for the City of New York, and due to the long-running persistence it will be impossible to ever "correct" this record. Therefore adequate corrective measures by these entities are no longer possible and only a damage award can bring justice in this matter. The evidence shows that in many snowstorms over the years measurements at surrounding reporting stations including JFK, LGA, EWR, have been significantly higher than CPK despite the fact that they virtually surround this reporting station (Appendix One 2016 seasonal totals from last March show: 31.6" for CPK, while LGA is 35.6, JFK 40.9, and EWR 36.2; in the most recent storm they show respectively, 5.1", 7.0, 8.2, 5.8 ). Additionally, scientific analysis (SEE attached report of Math23X7) shows that in the most recent storm between 4 p.m. and 7 p.m. the Conservancy reported .7" of snow fell, despite radar showing heavy banding over the city, and a qpf of .11" fell during that time frame with high ratios.

Therefore, we submit the following findings to the court with a prayer for relief:

Whereas, NOAA and the National Weather Service (hereafter "NWS") have consistently relied upon and reported a persistent and long-running under measurement of snowfall totals in Central Park; and
Whereas, these under measurements have been repeatedly confirmed by lay observers, snowfall experts, comparisons to multiple surrounding reporting stations, and scientific statistical analysis of snowfall rates and qpf versus actual reported snow totals within specified time-frames; and
Whereas, NOAA and the NWS have relied upon and endorsed this egregious undercounting and have in fact failed to correct the problem even after being so notified; and
Whereas the Central Park Conservancy and the Wildlife Conservation Society (in its role as manager of the Central Park Zoo) and the City of New York by granting authority to these organizations, has been directly responsible for these incompetent and damaging under measurements; and
Whereas, this has caused official snowfall records in New York City to be forever tarnished with no hope of correction; and
Whereas, this outcome has caused stress, agitation, loss of appetite, loss of sleep, and other forms of pain and suffering mentioned and unmentioned, to CPcantmeasuresnow, the People of OTI writ large, and even many inhabitants of the mainland,
We hereby move for a judgement of guilt against these organizations and an award for damages totaling $1 billion American dollars/or 26 billion mangos in OTI currency (or, the equivalent amount of COW currency should the official currency of OTI at any point convert to that fiscal system). This damage award is payable to the OTI Treasury and should be ordered immediately.

Respectfully submitted,
Billg315
Acting Attorney General
OTI

by **docstox12** Sun Jan 15, 2017 3:42 pm

billg315 wrote:As the Acting Attorney General for Off-Topic Island (self-appointed to the temporary position for the purposes of this legal action) I, Billg315, come before the Superior Weather Court and hereby give Notice of the following Motion to be heard at a time and place determined by this Honorable Court:

People of Off Topic Island and
CPcantmeasuresnow
v.
NOAA, the National Weather Service,
The Central Park Conservancy, the Wildlife
Conservation Society (in its role as
manager of the Central Park Zoo),
the City of New York, et al . . .

We hereby allege the following charges against the defendants in this case.

There has been a persistent under measurement of official snowfall totals in Central Park dating back many years, perhaps decades. This has led to tainted official snowfall totals for the City of New York, and due to the long-running persistence it will be impossible to ever "correct" this record. Therefore adequate corrective measures by these entities are no longer possible and only a damage award can bring justice in this matter. The evidence shows that in many snowstorms over the years measurements at surrounding reporting stations including JFK, LGA, EWR, have been significantly higher than CPK despite the fact that they virtually surround this reporting station (Appendix One 2016 seasonal totals from last March show: 31.6" for CPK, while LGA is 35.6, JFK 40.9, and EWR 36.2; in the most recent storm they show respectively, 5.1", 7.0, 8.2, 5.8 ). Additionally, scientific analysis (SEE attached report of Math23X7) shows that in the most recent storm between 4 p.m. and 7 p.m. the Conservancy reported .7" of snow fell, despite radar showing heavy banding over the city, and a qpf of .11" fell during that time frame with high ratios.

Therefore, we submit the following findings to the court with a prayer for relief:

Whereas, NOAA and the National Weather Service (hereafter "NWS") have consistently relied upon and reported a persistent and long-running under measurement of snowfall totals in Central Park; and
Whereas, these under measurements have been repeatedly confirmed by lay observers, snowfall experts, comparisons to multiple surrounding reporting stations, and scientific statistical analysis of snowfall rates and qpf versus actual reported snow totals within specified time-frames; and
Whereas, NOAA and the NWS have relied upon and endorsed this egregious undercounting and have in fact failed to correct the problem even after being so notified; and
Whereas the Central Park Conservancy and the Wildlife Conservation Society (in its role as manager of the Central Park Zoo) and the City of New York by granting authority to these organizations, has been directly responsible for these incompetent and damaging under measurements; and
Whereas, this has caused official snowfall records in New York City to be forever tarnished with no hope of correction; and
Whereas, this outcome has caused stress, agitation, loss of appetite, loss of sleep, and other forms of pain and suffering mentioned and unmentioned, to CPcantmeasuresnow, the People of OTI writ large, and even many inhabitants of the mainland,
We hereby move for a judgement of guilt against these organizations and an award for damages totaling $1 billion American dollars/or 26 billion mangos in OTI currency (or, the equivalent amount of COW currency should the official currency of OTI at any point convert to that fiscal system). This damage award is payable to the OTI Treasury and should be ordered immediately.

Respectfully submitted,
Billg315
Acting Attorney General
OTI

THIS IS MAGNIFICENT!!!!! GENIUS!!!! AMAZING!!!!!

I, Docstox, Director of Parliament not only grant by Proclamation and official decree, Billg315 permanent citizenship status on OTI, but also promotion IMMEDIATELY, to position of Attorny General, removing the 'acting" status. I have rushed a copy of this brilliant legal brief to the Sanitarium to be taken to CP's therapy room hoping to accelerate his treatment plan and get him back into full duties in processing, as Director of the Treasury, the massive award that the Conservancy soon will be paying to OTI.

by **docstox12** Sun Jan 15, 2017 3:47 pm

Grselig wrote:CP. my thoughts and prayers for a speedy recover prior to the potential February blockbusters. Hope that lawsuit teaches those bastards a lesson.

I wholeheartedly agree with your kind words ,Grselig, on the hope that our beloved and esteemed Treasury Director and Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler will rapidly recover from the unfortunate circumstances he is in at the Sanitarium as a result of his heartfelt efforts at correcting a major statistical malfeasance perpetrated by the Conservancy.

by Guest Sun Jan 15, 2017 4:07 pm

Great words but screw a lawsuit. Let's go to the conservatory old school and kick some Ass. Godfather style

And as far as CP goes until I meet that guy or see a picture I am going to continue to contend that he is Llauler from the old weather board.

by **billg315** Sun Jan 15, 2017 4:07 pm

Thank you doc. It is a great honor to be granted citizenship and this prestigious position. I hope my selection is ratified by all members of the island.

by **Grselig** Sun Jan 15, 2017 4:35 pm

Excellent legal document. The great Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes proudly is beaming upon the argument presented as genius and he wishes he were alive today to hear the case. I pray the court considers awarding punitive damages as those actions rise to the level of intentional wrongful act and resulted in such horrific consequences that other responsible weather authorities must be made to understand that a repeat of said offenses will result in heavy loss. I have heard from reliable sources that the Defendants have already hired heavy counsel.
http://www.brucecutler.com

Time to go the the mattresses.

by **billg315** Sun Jan 15, 2017 4:49 pm

If they dare challenge us on this issue, my rebuttal to their closing statement is prepared:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDmGhethEoQ

by **Grselig** Sun Jan 15, 2017 4:51 pm

billg315 wrote:If they dare challenge us on this issue, my rebuttal to their closing statement is prepared:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDmGhethEoQ

YES!!!!!!!!!!! And Herman Munster is the judge!!!!!!!!!!

by **billg315** Sun Jan 15, 2017 4:52 pm

Grselig wrote:
billg315 wrote:If they dare challenge us on this issue, my rebuttal to their closing statement is prepared:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDmGhethEoQ

YES!!!!!!!!!!! And Herman Munster is the judge!!!!!!!!!!

We could have no better judge for this issue.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sun Jan 15, 2017 5:12 pm

docstox12 wrote:
Grselig wrote:CP. my thoughts and prayers for a speedy recover prior to the potential February blockbusters. Hope that lawsuit teaches those bastards a lesson.

I wholeheartedly agree with your kind words ,Grselig, on the hope that our beloved and esteemed Treasury Director and Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler will rapidly recover from the unfortunate circumstances he is in at the Sanitarium as a result of his heartfelt efforts at correcting a major statistical malfeasance perpetrated by the Conservancy.

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Sun Jan 15, 2017 5:13 pm

docstox12 wrote:
billg315 wrote:As the Acting Attorney General for Off-Topic Island (self-appointed to the temporary position for the purposes of this legal action) I, Billg315, come before the Superior Weather Court and hereby give Notice of the following Motion to be heard at a time and place determined by this Honorable Court:

People of Off Topic Island and
CPcantmeasuresnow
v.
NOAA, the National Weather Service,
The Central Park Conservancy, the Wildlife
Conservation Society (in its role as
manager of the Central Park Zoo),
the City of New York, et al . . .

We hereby allege the following charges against the defendants in this case.

There has been a persistent under measurement of official snowfall totals in Central Park dating back many years, perhaps decades. This has led to tainted official snowfall totals for the City of New York, and due to the long-running persistence it will be impossible to ever "correct" this record. Therefore adequate corrective measures by these entities are no longer possible and only a damage award can bring justice in this matter. The evidence shows that in many snowstorms over the years measurements at surrounding reporting stations including JFK, LGA, EWR, have been significantly higher than CPK despite the fact that they virtually surround this reporting station (Appendix One 2016 seasonal totals from last March show: 31.6" for CPK, while LGA is 35.6, JFK 40.9, and EWR 36.2; in the most recent storm they show respectively, 5.1", 7.0, 8.2, 5.8 ). Additionally, scientific analysis (SEE attached report of Math23X7) shows that in the most recent storm between 4 p.m. and 7 p.m. the Conservancy reported .7" of snow fell, despite radar showing heavy banding over the city, and a qpf of .11" fell during that time frame with high ratios.

Therefore, we submit the following findings to the court with a prayer for relief:

Whereas, NOAA and the National Weather Service (hereafter "NWS") have consistently relied upon and reported a persistent and long-running under measurement of snowfall totals in Central Park; and
Whereas, these under measurements have been repeatedly confirmed by lay observers, snowfall experts, comparisons to multiple surrounding reporting stations, and scientific statistical analysis of snowfall rates and qpf versus actual reported snow totals within specified time-frames; and
Whereas, NOAA and the NWS have relied upon and endorsed this egregious undercounting and have in fact failed to correct the problem even after being so notified; and
Whereas the Central Park Conservancy and the Wildlife Conservation Society (in its role as manager of the Central Park Zoo) and the City of New York by granting authority to these organizations, has been directly responsible for these incompetent and damaging under measurements; and
Whereas, this has caused official snowfall records in New York City to be forever tarnished with no hope of correction; and
Whereas, this outcome has caused stress, agitation, loss of appetite, loss of sleep, and other forms of pain and suffering mentioned and unmentioned, to CPcantmeasuresnow, the People of OTI writ large, and even many inhabitants of the mainland,
We hereby move for a judgement of guilt against these organizations and an award for damages totaling $1 billion American dollars/or 26 billion mangos in OTI currency (or, the equivalent amount of COW currency should the official currency of OTI at any point convert to that fiscal system). This damage award is payable to the OTI Treasury and should be ordered immediately.

Respectfully submitted,
Billg315
Acting Attorney General
OTI

THIS IS MAGNIFICENT!!!!! GENIUS!!!! AMAZING!!!!!

I, Docstox, Director of Parliament not only grant by Proclamation and official decree, Billg315 permanent citizenship status on OTI, but also promotion IMMEDIATELY, to position of Attorny General, removing the 'acting" status. I have rushed a copy of this brilliant legal brief to the Sanitarium to be taken to CP's therapy room hoping to accelerate his treatment plan and get him back into full duties in processing, as Director of the Treasury, the massive award that the Conservancy soon will be paying to OTI.

I can only echo the words magnificent and maybe add brilliant, sublime and fabulous.

Lincolns Gettysburg address pales in comparison.

Welcome to OTI Attorney General Billg.

When you win this lawsuit for the citizens of OTI we may finally to be able to purchase those hammocks the Doc has been promising the citizenry for years.

Also because of his continuous support for OTI through the years I would like to put Greslig (Thundersnow) up for citizenship. If only Taffy were around to the see the Islands population soaring.

Doc the Abott and Costello clip had my sides aching. For those that haven't seen it below is the link Doc posted.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0eUFhMRVHA

ANd aS For YoU SYos, If ALl elsE FAIls i hAVe No oBJEctIoN tO a gOOd AsS KicKINg.

by **Grselig** Sun Jan 15, 2017 7:01 pm

Finally, decent honest people in government!!!! Men and women with character, integrity and downright goodness. By the People and for the People.

by **Math23x7** Sun Jan 15, 2017 7:35 pm

billg315 wrote:As the Acting Attorney General for Off-Topic Island (self-appointed to the temporary position for the purposes of this legal action) I, Billg315, come before the Superior Weather Court and hereby give Notice of the following Motion to be heard at a time and place determined by this Honorable Court:

People of Off Topic Island and
CPcantmeasuresnow
v.
NOAA, the National Weather Service,
The Central Park Conservancy, the Wildlife
Conservation Society (in its role as
manager of the Central Park Zoo),
the City of New York, et al . . .

We hereby allege the following charges against the defendants in this case.

There has been a persistent under measurement of official snowfall totals in Central Park dating back many years, perhaps decades. This has led to tainted official snowfall totals for the City of New York, and due to the long-running persistence it will be impossible to ever "correct" this record. Therefore adequate corrective measures by these entities are no longer possible and only a damage award can bring justice in this matter. The evidence shows that in many snowstorms over the years measurements at surrounding reporting stations including JFK, LGA, EWR, have been significantly higher than CPK despite the fact that they virtually surround this reporting station (Appendix One 2016 seasonal totals from last March show: 31.6" for CPK, while LGA is 35.6, JFK 40.9, and EWR 36.2; in the most recent storm they show respectively, 5.1", 7.0, 8.2, 5.8 ). Additionally, scientific analysis (SEE attached report of Math23X7) shows that in the most recent storm between 4 p.m. and 7 p.m. the Conservancy reported .7" of snow fell, despite radar showing heavy banding over the city, and a qpf of .11" fell during that time frame with high ratios.

Therefore, we submit the following findings to the court with a prayer for relief:

Whereas, NOAA and the National Weather Service (hereafter "NWS") have consistently relied upon and reported a persistent and long-running under measurement of snowfall totals in Central Park; and
Whereas, these under measurements have been repeatedly confirmed by lay observers, snowfall experts, comparisons to multiple surrounding reporting stations, and scientific statistical analysis of snowfall rates and qpf versus actual reported snow totals within specified time-frames; and
Whereas, NOAA and the NWS have relied upon and endorsed this egregious undercounting and have in fact failed to correct the problem even after being so notified; and
Whereas the Central Park Conservancy and the Wildlife Conservation Society (in its role as manager of the Central Park Zoo) and the City of New York by granting authority to these organizations, has been directly responsible for these incompetent and damaging under measurements; and
Whereas, this has caused official snowfall records in New York City to be forever tarnished with no hope of correction; and
Whereas, this outcome has caused stress, agitation, loss of appetite, loss of sleep, and other forms of pain and suffering mentioned and unmentioned, to CPcantmeasuresnow, the People of OTI writ large, and even many inhabitants of the mainland,
We hereby move for a judgement of guilt against these organizations and an award for damages totaling $1 billion American dollars/or 26 billion mangos in OTI currency (or, the equivalent amount of COW currency should the official currency of OTI at any point convert to that fiscal system). This damage award is payable to the OTI Treasury and should be ordered immediately.

Respectfully submitted,
Billg315
Acting Attorney General
OTI

One of the best posts, if not THE BEST post I have ever seen on the NJ Strong Weather Forum! savior

by **billg315** Sun Jan 15, 2017 7:40 pm

Math23x7 wrote:
billg315 wrote:As the Acting Attorney General for Off-Topic Island (self-appointed to the temporary position for the purposes of this legal action) I, Billg315, come before the Superior Weather Court and hereby give Notice of the following Motion to be heard at a time and place determined by this Honorable Court:

People of Off Topic Island and
CPcantmeasuresnow
v.
NOAA, the National Weather Service,
The Central Park Conservancy, the Wildlife
Conservation Society (in its role as
manager of the Central Park Zoo),
the City of New York, et al . . .

We hereby allege the following charges against the defendants in this case.

There has been a persistent under measurement of official snowfall totals in Central Park dating back many years, perhaps decades. This has led to tainted official snowfall totals for the City of New York, and due to the long-running persistence it will be impossible to ever "correct" this record. Therefore adequate corrective measures by these entities are no longer possible and only a damage award can bring justice in this matter. The evidence shows that in many snowstorms over the years measurements at surrounding reporting stations including JFK, LGA, EWR, have been significantly higher than CPK despite the fact that they virtually surround this reporting station (Appendix One 2016 seasonal totals from last March show: 31.6" for CPK, while LGA is 35.6, JFK 40.9, and EWR 36.2; in the most recent storm they show respectively, 5.1", 7.0, 8.2, 5.8 ). Additionally, scientific analysis (SEE attached report of Math23X7) shows that in the most recent storm between 4 p.m. and 7 p.m. the Conservancy reported .7" of snow fell, despite radar showing heavy banding over the city, and a qpf of .11" fell during that time frame with high ratios.

Therefore, we submit the following findings to the court with a prayer for relief:

Whereas, NOAA and the National Weather Service (hereafter "NWS") have consistently relied upon and reported a persistent and long-running under measurement of snowfall totals in Central Park; and
Whereas, these under measurements have been repeatedly confirmed by lay observers, snowfall experts, comparisons to multiple surrounding reporting stations, and scientific statistical analysis of snowfall rates and qpf versus actual reported snow totals within specified time-frames; and
Whereas, NOAA and the NWS have relied upon and endorsed this egregious undercounting and have in fact failed to correct the problem even after being so notified; and
Whereas the Central Park Conservancy and the Wildlife Conservation Society (in its role as manager of the Central Park Zoo) and the City of New York by granting authority to these organizations, has been directly responsible for these incompetent and damaging under measurements; and
Whereas, this has caused official snowfall records in New York City to be forever tarnished with no hope of correction; and
Whereas, this outcome has caused stress, agitation, loss of appetite, loss of sleep, and other forms of pain and suffering mentioned and unmentioned, to CPcantmeasuresnow, the People of OTI writ large, and even many inhabitants of the mainland,
We hereby move for a judgement of guilt against these organizations and an award for damages totaling $1 billion American dollars/or 26 billion mangos in OTI currency (or, the equivalent amount of COW currency should the official currency of OTI at any point convert to that fiscal system). This damage award is payable to the OTI Treasury and should be ordered immediately.

Respectfully submitted,
Billg315
Acting Attorney General
OTI

One of the best posts, if not THE BEST post I have ever seen on the NJ Strong Weather Forum!

Thanks Mike!

by **docstox12** Mon Jan 16, 2017 1:44 am

Grselig wrote:Finally, decent honest people in government!!!! Men and women with character, integrity and downright goodness. By the People and for the People.

Being sponsored by our esteemed Director of the Treasury and Grand High Exalted Mystic Ruler CP, Parliament ,in a special early morning session, grants you official citizenship status of OTI for your continued loyalty and support of Island issues these many months.Welcome to OTI!!

Sigend Docstox
Director of Parliament
Director OTI Samitarium

1:43 AM January 16 Anno Domani 2017

by **docstox12** Mon Jan 16, 2017 1:48 am

billg315 wrote:Thank you doc. It is a great honor to be granted citizenship and this prestigious position. I hope my selection is ratified by all members of the island.

Attorney General Billg, your citizenship and election to Attorney General was ratified unanimously by Parliament in a special early morning session.I will meet you at the Parliament Building forthwith to give you a tour and show you your office and staff that has been prepared for you in your pending case.

Docstox
Director of Parliament
Director OTI Sanitarium

1:46 AM, January 16 Anno Domani 2017

by **CPcantmeasuresnow** Mon Jan 16, 2017 4:04 am

Billg and Gres Thundersnow:

Welcome fellow citizens and congratulations. Before your swearing in ceremony, please memorize the OTI Pledge of Allegiance. And as you burn these words into the deepest recesses of your brain, dwell on their deep meaning and remember the sacrifices of those that came before you, to make OTI what it is today.

I pledge allegiance to OTI
Of the Off Topic Island Republic
And to former King Mugs
And the Queen he bequeathed
One Island Directed by Doc
Indivisible except by CP
With Snowman and Taffy for all

Amen

My stay at the Sanitarium should be over shortly, and I'm hoping to be up and of sound mind again and attending your swearing in ceremonies whenever Doc sets the date and time.

CP Cantmeasuresnow
Director of the Treasury
Grand High Exalted Mystique Ruler

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